No sooner do you talk to women about death than someone will say how Mother’s Day can be both a sad and happy occasion. While many women without mothers find themselves lost in a void of emptiness on this special day, others look for happiness within their legacy of loss.
How to celebrate without a mom on Mother’s Day.
Many women find happiness, strength and courage within their legacy of loss.
55 years young
Mom died just after my twenty-fifth birthday. I’m 42 years old now. While the pain of mom’s death has gone, my sense of loss is forever in the back of my mind. Yet, I genuinely believe if she hadn’t died before her time, I wouldn’t be the survivor I am. My strong-willed, self-reliant, and fiercely independent nature resulted in a beautiful life.
For me, Mother’s Day starts with a private ritual. I wake early and brew a pot of tea. In the quiet of the early morning, before the household stirs, I sit with mom’s photograph. While sipping tea in her honor, I recap the mother’s year that was.
I lost my mom to a heart attack when I was 30 years old. Her sudden departure from my world caused depths of pain words cannot explain. Even now, thinking about Mom brings tears to my eyes.
What’s more, I’m approaching fifty, the age when she died. The thought of my sudden death inflicting the same pain on my daughter used to keep me awake at night.
That’s why every Mother’s Day, my daughter stands me in front of the hallway mirror and makes me pledge aloud, “My mother’s fate is not my destiny.” Afterwards, she hugs me and then checks my Fitbit statistics.
For me, every Mother’s Day I celebrate is a gift.
I was just a teenager
My mother died over thirty years ago. I was just 14. I grew up without a caregiver, teacher, adversary or role model. Even today, I still question whether the path I took to womanhood was the right one. And when I look at my two adult daughters, the child inside longs to hear my mom say, “You did a good job raising your girls.”
So, on Mother’s Day, I take strength from my daughters. They’re both secure in their careers, beautifully feminine, and so confident. When they chorus, “Mom, we’re so proud of you,” I like to think that my long-dead mother’s approval of the woman I became resonates in my daughters’ love and laughter on Mother’s Day.
5 Super fun activities to celebrate mom
If you’re a motherless daughter there are many ways to join in the celebrations to honor your departed mom. Try these five inspirational mom remembrance ideas to get you posting and sharing with family and friends on this special day.
1. Make yours Heaven sent
Take a selfie with a family member or friend and post it on your socials. “Love to you in heaven, Mom. Happy Mother’s Day.”
2. Shadowbox memories of mom
Break out the photographs of mom and yourself. Transform them into something beautiful by telling your story inside a shadow box. Or choose a favorite Mom quote. Then take a photo and share it on social media. Others will love it too.
3. Say hello mother via a psychic
Why not pass on ‘hello Mom’ in person? Book a reading with a psychic, astrologer or tarot card reader. Even if this isn’t your thing, you’ll have something to chat about afterwards. Take a friend. Who knows, maybe your mom will have a message for you too.
4. Bake memorial cupcakes
Mother’s Day is not complete without cake. So, why not bake your mom’s number-one cupcake recipe? Add a touch of heaven to the icing with these gorgeous food-safe butterflies. However, before anyone can bite into their scrumptious cupcake, each family member must first share their favorite memory of your mom (Grandma).
5. Memorial garden
Create a gorgeous memorial space in the garden. Something as simple as adding a bench seat along with a memorial plaque or flag can create a sense of tranquillity. What’s more, you have a place to remember mom anytime, not just on Mother’s Day. Plus, don’t forget to take a selfie and post it to family and friends. Call it, ‘Remembering Mom, with love’.